Dentaltown New Grad Edition 2016 - 59

From Daughter to DDS By: Rebecca Tom, UCSF School of Dentistr y Class of 2019 Growing up, everyone would always tell me how much I looked like and acted like my mother. I hated it. I wanted to be my own individual without growing up in my mom's shadow. Now, don't get me wrong; my mom is a wonderf ul person! However, living in a community where my mom is a relatively well-known dentist who has looked into the mouths of my classmates, classmates' parents, teachers, and school administrators, everyone would look at me, the only daughter of Burbank 's friendly local female dentist, and automatically think that I was going to do everything she does. Maybe I sound like I went through a crazy rebellious adolescent phase, but I don't think I did. In fact, it was because I looked up to my mom so much that I wanted to make a good name for myself on my own accord. I wanted to meet the expectations and high achievements my mother made without needing to copy her. However, the circumstances that usually occur in our lives often tend to be very different than we anticipate. My mother attended UCLA for her undergraduate education, so I obviously had to go to Los Angeles's rival school, USC. I remember in my senior year of high school when I was applying for college, even then I felt the pressure of needing to have my future completely planned out. It seemed as if the first question out of any adult's mouth would be, "What are you doing after high school? What are you going to be studyin g? Are you going to be a dentist like your mom?" It was extremely hard for me to believe that at the young age of seventeen I should already know the trajector y of my life, and I also wanted to avoid taking the easy road of saying "yes, I'll be a dentist like my mom" by default. By the time I was in my freshma n year of college, I quickly learned that undergr ad was a lot harder than I original ly anticipated. Unprepared for the giant competitive lecture-based courses, I was nearly failing one of my classes, so I did what any new college student would do: I called my mom. I remember being so nervous that she would be disappointed with me, and I didn't want to let her down. I had no reason to be anxious about that phone call. My mom completely empathized with me, remembering how hard undergrad classes were, especially when first transitioning into them. She encouraged and reassured me, reminding me that she was supporting me the whole way, even and especially when things got tough. Needless to say, I did survive that semester, and I know I couldn't have done it without the support of my mom. A few months later, I was at home for summer vacation when my mom came home with a huge smile on her face. "Rebecca," she told me, "I got this cool letter in the mail, sent to me by one of my patients! For the longest time, this woman was unhappy with the way her teeth looked. She would keep her mouth closed while smiling, and she would cover her mouth when she talked, but she was scared of getting any treatments done to fi x it. Then, when she was planning on flying to go to a large reunion, she finally decided to give it a shot and get veneers. Today in the mail, I got these pictures of her with a huge smile on her face with all her friends. She said that they all kept mentioning how beautiful she looked, and it was the happiest she had felt in a long time." That story resonated with me, and I honestly believe it contributed to my view of dentistr y, even through today. Dentistr y is a healing profession, in more ways than simply treating physical disease; dentists are able to change the way that people view and express themselves and facilitate those relationships that are so importa nt for the way that we live as social creatures. However, the incredible thing about our role as dentists also lies in the opportunity to use our own abilities and strengths to provide care to our patients. I began seeing how the unique persona lity traits I've seen of my mom as her daughter contributed to the way she acts as a dentist. Similar to the way that she was understanding with me as I struggled in my freshma n year of college, she nurtures and sympathizes with her patients and truly listens to their concerns. It is with that heart that she is able to develop deep relationships with her patients and help them out of her own compassion, and that is something I find deeply inspiring about my mom. It was then that I realized that being in my mom's shadow meant a lot more than just following the same career path as her. It was about how the things that I appreciated and admired the most about my mom-the same qualities that she exemplifies daily as a dentist caring for patients -are incorporated in everything she does. I slowly realized my heart was changing. I shouldn't be looking at the prospect of also becoming a dentist to mean I was giving up and just following my mom's footsteps; rather, I could carve my own path alongside her with her now transitioning into a professional mentor to look up towards every step of the way. Even in dental school now, I know it isn't easy. But in those times when I am frustrated with my outline form not being perfect or the amalgam setting too quickly in my typodont, I can stop and remember how I was inspired by my mom's love for her patients to bring me to dental school and how this training will prepare me to do the same- and I am so excited for that. ■

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of Dentaltown New Grad Edition 2016