Family Doctor 2007 - (Page 207) kids & teens DISCIPLINE Tips on effective child discipline Explain to your child the consequences of his actions. Effective discipline is one of the most important elements of successful parenting, teaching our children empathy and self-control. And yet many parents don’t know where to start. Read on for some useful tips. By Sarah D. Garber punishing him or her for bad behavior. Be specific when giving praise. For example, say “good job sharing your toys,” instead of just “good job.” Y ou’ve heard it said so often: “I love my children, but being a parent can be so hard!” It’s true — there are some days when it’s difficult to get your child to behave. But remember, there are lots of things you can do now to help your child learn self-control. About spanking Spanking isn’t a good way to discipline a child. It can teach your child that it’s OK to hit when angry, it can physically hurt your child and it can make your child fearful of you or other adults. For information on other ways to discipline your child, talk to your family doctor, sign up for parenting classes at your local hospital or school, or read some parenting books or magazines. Provide age-appropriate discipline Discipline your child in ways that he or she can understand. For infants and toddlers, you can use a method called “redirecting.” When you redirect a child, you replace an unwanted behavior with an acceptable behavior. For example, if throwing a ball inside the house isn’t allowed, take your child outside to throw the ball. With older children, help them understand the consequences of their actions and take responsibility for them. For example, you can explain to your son that since he didn’t put his dirty laundry in the laundry basket, it didn’t get washed. As a result, he’ll have to wait until the next laundry day to get his favorite T-shirt washed. Dealing with frustration All parents get frustrated sometimes. It’s OK to take some time for yourself. Ask your partner, friends or family for help if you’re feeling overwhelmed. If you’re feeling very angry or are having trouble controlling your temper, talk to your family doctor or a local parenting support group. Remember that it’s OK to feel angry, but it’s not OK to take your anger out on your child. Be consistent Try not to make more rules than you really need. But once you make a rule or decide on a discipline approach, be sure to stick to it. If 2 parents are raising a child, both need to use the same rules. Although it may seem easier to occasionally ignore bad behaviors or skip following through with a consequence, you may only end up confusing your child. Find your own way Remember, there’s no one way to raise a child. And there’s no such thing as a perfect parent — or a perfect child. Sarah D. Garber is an associate editor with the American Academy of Family Physicians, headquartered in Leawood, Kan. Set a good example Children learn by watching their parents. Make sure to follow your own rules and model good behavior. ADDITIONAL INFORMATION American Academy of Family Physicians http://familydoctor.org/368.xml and http://familydoctor.org/201.xml KidsHealth http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/positive/family/discipline.html American Academy of Pediatrics http://www.aap.org/parents.html Praise good behavior Discipline is not just about punishment. Praising your child for his or her good behavior can be just as — if not more — effective than familydoctor 2007 207 http://familydoctor.org/368.xml http://familydoctor.org/201.xml http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/positive/talk/discipline.html http://www.aap.org/parents.html
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