GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 32

Splits ville
By kaREn GaIL LEwIs

Grandma without the grandpa
“I love being a grandma. I just never thought I’d be a grandma without a grandpa right beside me.”	Marlene	stifles	a	sob. “I can’t understand. How could he turn to someone else—and someone so much younger? Who does he think he is? He’s not Brad Pitt, for goodness sakes. With his pot belly hanging over his belt, what does she see in him anyway? She must think he has money. Boy, will she be surprised. He may talk pretty to her now, but I’m the one who has raised the kids, gotten dinner on the table, even though we both work. I’ve done his laundry, made sure he got his annual checkups. It’s like I’m	a	used	Kleenex—use	me,	 then throw me away.” Marlene is twisting a used tissue in her hand. “Our	first	grandchild	was	

Karen Gail Lewis, Ph.D., is a marriage and family therapist and author. Her newest book is Why Don’t You Understand? A Gender Relationship Dictionary. 32
GRAND

born a few years before Rob was coming up to retirement. So, I had dreams of us spending	the	free	time	babysitting, taking Miki to the zoo, Santa...all the things my friends do with their grandchildren. We were going to be wonderful at it. I just knew it.” She stares out the window, as	if	looking	back	at	her	longago dreams. Taking a deep breath, she continues. “Now Rob tells me he wants a divorce. Where was I that I didn’t even see it coming? That hurts, yes. But what hurts even more is I feel split apart. I’m no longer “Grandmaandgrandpa....” Marlene’s situation is a familiar story. People fall in love and marry. When the kids come, they transition from lovers	to	co-parents.	They	 devote their lives to raising their children—with or without work outside the home. They enjoy the pleasures and understand	the	sacrifices	of	 being parents, and the need to postpone their being lovers.

MAY JUNE 2010


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Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010

GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010
Contents
GRAND Treasure Hunt
I’m too young to be a grandparent!
GRAND Central
Want it? Win it!
Marian Robinson: First Grand
Around the world in 80 memories
7 travel essentials: Don’t leave home without ’em
Have health, will travel
Not so grand
Splitsville
Text-a-grand
Are you a safe driver?
Resources
GRAND Finale
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Intro
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 2
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Contents
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - GRAND Treasure Hunt
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 5
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - I’m too young to be a grandparent!
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 7
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 8
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 9
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 10
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - GRAND Central
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 12
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 13
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 14
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 15
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Want it? Win it!
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 17
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 18
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 19
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Marian Robinson: First Grand
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 21
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 22
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 23
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Around the world in 80 memories
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 25
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 7 travel essentials: Don’t leave home without ’em
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 27
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Have health, will travel
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 29
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Not so grand
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 31
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Splitsville
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 33
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Text-a-grand
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 35
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Are you a safe driver?
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 37
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 38
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 39
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 40
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 41
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 42
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - Resources
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - GRAND Finale
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 45
GRAND Magazine - May/June 2010 - 46
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