GRAND Magazine - November/December 2014 - (Page 58-59)
grandparent rights
PHOTOCREDIT: © CAN STOCK PHOTO INC. / JACKF
To fly, or not to fly,
along with
helicopter parents?
BY SUSAN HOFFMAN
D
ear Susan:
My daughter in law is so bossy and controlling she has
to micro manage every detail of my relationship with my
grandkids. She decides when and where I can see them, what they can
eat, what activities they can do, and now what I am allowed to buy
them. The children are five and seven years old and are able to express
their opinions. I have to admit I do give in to their wants whenever
they ask for something.
I never restricted my parents or my husband's parents from
buying my kids things let alone nit-picking every little thing and any
indulgence that comes along. After all what are grandparents for, if not
to spoil grandchildren?
I have had just about enough and I think it's time to speak my mind.
Signed,
Spoiling Grandma
Susan Hoffman is the author of the book A Precious
Bond and produced the first documentary film
(also titled A Precious Bond) about grandparent
visitation being denied.
58 GRAND
NOVEMBER DECEMBER 2014
Are you a helicopter parent?
Take a fun quiz to find out.
Dear SG:
I understand your frustration, but please hold off speaking your mind
or you may regret it. I say this because it could most likely be your
downfall, meaning you could lose complete access to the kids.
Parenting styles have changed and "spoiling" can be a deal-breaker.
Parents today are sometimes called "helicopter" parents, meaning
they constantly hover above every detail of their children's lives. They
over-function when it comes to parenting and they do not welcome
interference from well meaning grandparents.
Grandparents who think that voicing their opinion will change the
status quo are sadly mistaken. It will only jeopardize what you have.
Parents will not change, only you as grandparents can change by
getting on board with their program and doing so without conflict.
Expressing your discontent may make you feel better for a short
time, but not in the long term. There are better ways to get those
feelings of frustration out of your system. Guidelines are posted on our
website and included in our books.
In the meantime, bite your tongue, be patient, and comply with your
DIL's rules when it comes to the kids.
And when you start to feel like you're ready to lose it just send
yourself mantra prompts such as, "Attract bees with honey . . . "
Finally!
A documentary film
about unreasonably
denied grandparent
visitation rights.
A Precious Bond was
produced by Advocates
for Grandparent
Grandchild Connection
(AFGGC).
"A must-have for
grandparents being
denied visitation." Susan Adcox-About.com
For more
information or to
order call
949-640-0399
or Click Here
NOVEMBER DECEMBER 2014 GRAND
59
http://www.apreciousbond.com
http://www.csmonitor.com/The-Culture/Family/2012/0419/Are-you-a-Helicopter-Parent-Take-our-quiz/When-your-baby-drops-a-cookie-on-the-floor-you
http://www.apreciousbond.com
http://www.apreciousbond.com
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - November/December 2014
Contents
GRAND Magazine - November/December 2014
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2024spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2024winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2023fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2023summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2023winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020fall_v2
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20191112
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190910
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190708
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