GRAND Magazine - January/February 2017 - 41
grand style
Burlap sack or bridal gown?
BY DEBBY CARROLL
W
hy are you wearing that burlap sack?" asked my Aunt
Essie, none too politely.
It was 1974; my wedding day, and nothing about
it was what I would have chosen, well, except for the groom and
the dress.
My parents planned a traditional wedding for us while Ned and
I dreamed of anything but. We were hippies and picturing marrying barefoot on a beach somewhere. Instead we were married on a
dreary Sunday afternoon in a charmless catering hall in Philadelphia.
But the dress was one I found in a shop that sold peasant-style
clothing. I loved it; it cost $35. I knew my mother wouldn't
41 GRAND
JANUARY FEBRUARY 2017
approve so I didn't even invite her along while I shopped.
In retrospect, am I sorry I forfeited the one day in your life
(if you're lucky) you get to go all out bride and wear a wedding
dress? Not exactly; but I do regret denying my mother, who died
three years after my wedding, the day of joy that comes from
shopping for a wedding dress with your daughter.
I experienced that joy with my first daughter and again this fall
with my middle child, Tamra. My girls know how I shop so they
were prepared for the way this Mom would hunt for the right
dress, at the right price. I did my homework because I've heard
lots of stories from fellow MoB (mothers of the bride) about
wedding dress shopping trips resulting in drama, tears, and
dismay. I know more than one MoB who schlepped to 20+ stores.
Exhausting and exasperating!
This shopping trip should be fun and fabulous. I strongly suggest beginning the search with a warm heart to heart about expectations. First and foremost, remind your daughter the main focus
of the wedding day is the marriage to the right partner, not what
you wear. In truth, the gowns, as you can see here, are all pretty
awesome and they look similar. It's best not to make yourself crazy
chasing perfection. If she finds one she loves, it's a smart move not
to wonder if there's a better one out there somewhere.
Continued on next page
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - January/February 2017
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