GRAND Magazine - March/April 2017 - 24
memories and moments
A New Era
BY HELEN MANDLIN
M
y partner Joe and I are bi-coastal, spending five months
a year in Cambria, California, escaping the summer heat
and winter cold of New York City.
Cambria had always felt like heaven but this summer, it was hell.
Almost every day, my chest was tight. At 67, I felt homesick for the
first time.
Why? Because I had become a grandmother the previous January 20th
when James Trevor was born. A month later, I flew to Washington, D.C. for a
ten-day visit with my son Jason, his wife Lucy, and their new little boy.
I stayed nearby and respected Lucy's nursing schedule, when she wanted
to be alone with James. I felt a bit of loneliness and a sense of being left out.
My son had married into a large, stable family, completely different from the family Jason had with me: one sister and a cousin, both of
whom I seldom saw. Everyone else - my parents, Jason's father, a handful
of cousins- were all either dead or out of touch.
James was precious; he laughed as I played with his toes and sang
"Bicycle Built For Two." One afternoon, when Lucy was out, Jason
announced, "I'm exhausted, Mom. Can you rock James to sleep?"
"
"
That's when it hit me:
James was going to change my life.
I rocked James. Soon he and Jason were asleep. I looked at both of
them and traveled back in time. When Jason was ten years old, he told
me, "Mom, I'm gonna have three kids and be a great Dad." He wanted to
be different than his charming, alcoholic father.
That's when it hit me: James was going to change my life. I didn't know
how, but I knew he would. As a child I'd been very close with my grandmother,
Bubby. I slept at her house every Friday night for as long as I could remember.
Now, with me living in NYC and spending so many months in Cambria...well,
there was no chance of that happening for James.
24 GRAND
MARCH APRIL 2017
The highlight of my visit was when I accompanied Jason, Lucy
and James to dinner at a restaurant. James needed a diaper change.
Despite her saying she didn't need any help, I walked with Lucy to the
bathroom. The bathroom had only one piece of furniture with barely
enough room for James to lie down. Lucy, keeping one hand on James'
tummy, handed me his dirty diaper, asked for wipes from her wellequipped "baby bag," and then a clean diaper. I felt like I'd assisted in
surgery.
Continue Reading
Helen Mandlin is a native New Yorker.
Check out her blog at elenmandlin.
wordpress.com
http://www.grandmagazine.com/2017/02/a-new-era-grandmom/
http://helenmandlin.com
http://helenmandlin.com
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - March/April 2017
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2024spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2024winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2023fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2023summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2023winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2022winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2021winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020fall
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020fall_v2
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020summer
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020spring
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/2020winter
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20191112
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190910
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190708
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190506
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190304
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20190102
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20181112_drm
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20181112
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20180910
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20180708
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20180506
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20180304
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20180102
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20171112
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20170910
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20170708
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20170506
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20170304
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20170102
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20161112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20160910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20160708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20160506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20160304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20160102_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20151112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20150910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20150708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20150506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20150304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20150102_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/201401112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20140910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20140708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20140506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20140304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20140102_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20131112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20130910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20130708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20130506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20130304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20130102_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20121112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20120910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20120708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20120506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20120304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20120102_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20111112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20110910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20110708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20110506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20110304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20110102_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20101112_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20100910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20100708_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20100506_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20100304_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/201001_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200912_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200911_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200909_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200908_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200907_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200906_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200905_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20080910_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200904_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200903_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/200902_v3
https://www.nxtbook.com/nxtbooks/grand/20081112_v6
https://www.nxtbookmedia.com