GRAND Magazine - May/June 2018 - 22

grand living

Give up the bucket list

A few years back, a student of ours was planning a
vacation. At the same time, he was also studying for
a licensure exam and weighing the merits of his longterm relationship. Despite his full plate, he decided to
look at the vacation for its real purpose: an opportunity to connect with himself and his significant other,
to spend time studying in an uninterrupted environment, and to rest.
In the mornings, he awoke and studied. In the
afternoons, he spent quality time engaging with his
girlfriend. In the evening, he exercised, took more
time to study, and then spent the later part of the
evening again with his girlfriend. After his five-day
break, he felt refreshed, rejuvenated, and ready to get
his licensure. Not only was he ready for his exam, he
felt ready for the next big step in his life-he asked
his girlfriend to marry him! His vacation wasn't about
getting away-it was about going toward. He was
able to have a more complete, fulfilling experience
because he approached it with purpose. He saw it as
the best vacation he'd ever had-with the most positive results for his life.

"Going into leisure time
with a greater purpose gives
us focus."

Our time needs to be spent on meaningful activities-not simply things we feel we're supposed to do
because that's what the itinerary says. Rather than
creating great memories, we focus on creating great
realities-where we're touched deeply, and we reconnect, learn, and grow.
22 GRAND

When we return to our "regular lives," we should
find them enhanced. After our leisure time, we're
ready to bring more of ourselves back to our daily
lives, whether through shifts in our perspectives, a
deeper sense of purpose, or by applying our self-discoveries and things we've learned. Leisure time
should be an opportunity for enriching our lives and
the lives we touch, holding each other more deeply
in our hearts.
Often vacations and leisure time are spent with
family. Think more deeply about your family visits.
When you visit your adult children and grandchildren, do you try to connect with them about their
interests? Do you really get to know them-what
they care about, what they value, what they feel and
think? If you're visiting a college student, do you take
an interest in what they're learning and studying?
When you look for a souvenir to send to them, is it
something that really interests them?
If your kids or grandkids are studying sociology,
literature, or economics, do you make an effort to
learn about these topics? If we're truly living our
best lives, we should constantly seek new endeavors
and new experiences to connect us. Not only so we
connect and engage with our children and grandchildren, but so we enrich and find meaning in our
own lives as well. Follow their example to become
curious and playful. Embrace life-long learning.

MAY JUNE 2018

"Purpose and conscious
intent helps you get more
out of your travel and
entertainment-and your life."

A few years ago, the "bucket list" concept became
popular. Many people love the idea of having a to-do
list we tick off as we go. We indulge in the experience
so we can check it off our life list, share the photos
on social media, and add a wine label to our scrapbook. It's more about the list than the experience
itself. But are we really engaged?
A better question for us to ask ourselves is, what
value are we generating in the world? What am I getting out of what I'm doing? What am I contributing? If
we're visiting grandchildren, are we losing ourselves
in our grandkids? Or are we developing our transgenerational family culture through growing, learning, and living lives of meaning and service?
Thinking about why we're doing what we're doing
leads us to ask bigger questions like: How can I live
this day more purposefully? How can I derive more
meaning and fulfillment in my life? What's the purpose of our vacation?
Sound like a tall order for your weekend trip to the
Cape? It might be. It might also be one of the most
rejuvenating experiences you've ever had!

Click here to learn how to engage
and be happier
Relationships experts, world-class
coaches, and best-selling authors,
Dr. Judith and Dr. Bob Wright
are co-founders of the Wright
Foundation for the Realization of
Human Potential and The Wright
Graduate University and authors of
The Heart of the Fight

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0994809700/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=grandmagazi0d-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=0994809700&linkId=c0cf2342749a51234e00421ef2df453e https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003B6QYSW/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=grandmagazi0d-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B003B6QYSW&linkId=74a78ba0a510c9871c2e38f745d59213 http://www.heartofthefight.com/ http://www.grandmagazine.com/2018/02/feeling-phubbed-smartphones-dilute-relationships/ http://www.grandmagazine.com/2018/02/feeling-phubbed-smartphones-dilute-relationships/ http://www.grandmagazine.com/2018/04/fun-filled-and-full-filled-vacations/ http://www.grandmagazine.com/2018/03/transformational-learning-age/ http://www.thewrightfoundation.org/ http://www.thewrightfoundation.org/ http://www.thewrightfoundation.org/ http://www.heartofthefight.com/

GRAND Magazine - May/June 2018

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - May/June 2018