KBB - February 2009 - (Page 44)

Opinion Family by Design Putting more than food on the table No matter what we do for a living or how much money we make, we hear in speeches all the time that everybody’s number one goal is to “put food on the table”—ﬁrst for our children, next for our spouses and partners, then for our elders and, ﬁnally, for ourselves. Many social rules and rituals surround the simple idea of putting food on the table. For example, the West Point Gentleman’s Code states that “Gentlemen stand when a lady comes to be seated and begin dining only after she takes the ﬁrst bite.” Others have been established by some pretty big traditions! At our house, my wife insists on everyone wearing a shirt. I insist on hats being removed. Elbows off the table, napkins in laps and no rocking back in the chairs are a few more I can think of right off the bat. through somebody else, and will be exclusive—both, in my view, are very rude. This may be almost tolerable for a quick one-time meal (like category-ﬁve holidays), but not at all for everyday dining and communicating. Speaking of which, “Don’t talk with your mouth full!” SERVING STYLES How we serve food differs from family to family. Some households bring serving dishes to the table with ladles, while some (like the Army) dish it up in the kitchen and you take it to the table. Settings are done formally or not, with some in-between. And then there’s the accompanying soundtrack: “Junior, it’s your turn to set the table.” “Ma, do I have ta?” “Yes! Forks Rituals are what form us and inspire our traditions, values and memories—they give us ourselves. MENU OPTIONS Of course, there’s also the food itself, whose variety and consumption inspire much conversation, also a kind of daily ritual. Just as our meals may include savory food, appetizers, snacks, sweets, salty, crunchy, crispy, main courses, desserts and fruits—wow!—our tables would be incomplete without the sounds of: “Hey, mom, what’s for dinner?”, “Don’t forget: you must eat your vegetables and meat or no dessert,” “Clean your plate,” and “What’s for lunch, June?” Also commonly heard: Oh, not that again! I hate this. I love this. What is this? Never mind what it is, just eat it! What would you like to drink? And can you nuke this for just 30 seconds more, please? on the left, knives on the right, spoons to the right of the knives, napkin under the fork!” “Why?” “Because that’s how civilized people eat!” “Why do we have to be civilized?” “Just do it or you’ll ﬁnd out what uncivilized feels like!” Thank goodness “Grace” comes along to prevent an assault. FAMILY FIRST So what does all of this mean for us kitchen designers? I believe that if your kitchen works easily to keep your family together and connected at mealtime, you have half a chance of having a healthy family life. Make a mess of the architecture, and the family proﬁle will be much different. One-time deals are one thing, but the daily and yearly rituals are what form us and inspire our traditions, values and memories—they give us ourselves. Someone once said, “We create the architecture, and then the architecture re-creates us.” As kitchen designers, we should be putting food on our own tables by helping others store, prepare, deliver and dine in an environment that builds family. Let’s be careful what we create. The whole of civilization depends on it! Start your design with the “family-building, communication-friendly, easy-to-service” table. They’ll be putting food on and themselves at that table for a long time. Nothing is more important than the table arrangement. It just may be the unsung sacred place of family life together. I —Mark Brady is a Connecticut-based kitchen and interior designer. He would like to hear some of your traditions and “rules” of the table. Email him at markbradykitchens@yahoo.com. TABLE TOPS The way we eat has also changed, taking on as many forms as our tables. Formal dining, informal dining, fast food, meals on the go or ready to eat—which will it be? Sometimes the tail wags the dog, and the table shape, size and location determine the dining mode. There are round tables (see King Arthur’s Court), square tables, rectangular ones, breakfast bars, dinettes, picnic tables and breakfast nooks (both for contortionists), and even the console of the car! My preference is a round table— nobody has a better seat, and easy eye contact with your dining mates is pretty much guaranteed. Straight-sided rectangles that are long or bars that are straight ensure that conversations with anyone other than the person right across from you will be over, around and 44 + K BB February July 2004 2009 / www.kbbonline.com / The Ofﬁcial Sponsor of K/BIS www.kbis.com http://www.kbbonline.com http://www.kbis.com

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KBB - February 2009