SEAHO Report - Summer 2017 - 45

while grounded in history, insight, and experience.

SEAHO Features

Are you glad this will be your last (fill in the blank)? No. I struggled mightily with the decision to retire. I
have worked at my alma mater in Residence Life for over 38 years. I know I'm more than a res life/housing
person but the individual I am today is the result of years of living this role and the title that comes with it. Like
many of us, my identity is closely tied to my profession. I met my dearest friends through my position. My
purpose and sometimes the meaning in my life became blurred with my work. I absolutely love what I do and
still cannot imagine not getting up and coming to my office every Monday through Friday. So, no, I am not for
a minute focusing on the lasts. Will I ever be able to duplicate the sheer joy and exhilaration I have experienced
from working with inspiring colleagues dedicated to student success; of helping a student through a challenging
time; of watching young student staff grow into dynamic, caring leaders; of developing a budget that reflects
our values and allows us to improve our services; of being a member of a building committee designing a new
residence hall; of preparing for and surviving a hurricane; of mentoring new professionals; of hearing a parent
say thank you for helping their child; of joining housing colleagues from all over the world to learn and grow
as a profession; or, of simply chatting with co-workers as we pee in our separate stalls in the hall restroom? I
get very wistful as I realize it is the unassuming and even mundane rhythm of the work day and the people with
whom I've shared my Monday through Friday existence that I will miss most.
Recently I served on a panel of senior student affairs staff talking with higher education graduate students and
entry level professionals. One of the graduate students asked if there was something we disliked about our jobs.
My response was that after all my years is I still don't like saying no. Don't get me wrong, I say no just about
every day and I do so with the conviction of knowing it's the right response. Although I sometimes wished
our policies didn't require consistency I knew I had been part of the decision and needed to be true to the
department and the university. Saying no forced me to find ways to make the person with whom I was speaking
to not only understand why I had to say no but ideally to understand, respect, and possibly agree with the
decision. Knowing I would have to say no made me a better listener and genuinely empathetic because I never
wanted to be seen as an insensitive, uncaring bureaucrat.
You're here. I thought you would blow off this meeting since you're retiring soon. Yes, I'm here and I will
continue to be here through my last official day - and then still here in spirit. I care deeply about my institution,
our students, and my staff and have prided myself in being conscientious, dependable, engaged, committed,
and a team player. It surprised me that someone would actually think I would blow off a meeting because I
am retiring. Did the person who said this not know me better? Had I ever sent a signal that I was not fully
invested in our work? This particular meeting was about planning for the future and I knew the res life/housing
perspective needed to be considered in the discussion. I simply could not blow it off and risk jeopardizing the
safety or well-being of our students or staff just because I would be retiring in the coming months.
Are you still here? Yes. Are you counting down the days? No. I've never wanted to wish my life away and I
try to appreciate each day, knowing the present is a gift. My brain knows no other way of functioning than to
come to work and do what I've done for years. I have plans for retirement but I haven't formalized anything
and won't until I am no longer working. My goal is to close this chapter of my life with grace and gratitude;
to take stock in my accomplishments; to try to overlook my many weaknesses and failures; to reflect on the
thousands of students and staff members with whom I've had the privilege of working: and to celebrate a career
that I have loved.
Impending retirement encourages people to reflect on their careers and I've taken plenty of time to do that.
During my early years as a live-in staff member I had responsibility for a hall that housed all first year women.
On the first day of opening in the fall the RAs hosted a keg party for the new residents. RAs across campus
were doing the same thing with their freshman halls. The drinking age was 18 then and we purchased one keg
45

SEAHO Report Summer 2017

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of SEAHO Report - Summer 2017