Training Industry Magazine - November/December 2016 - 22

1 | Be Present.
Be fully present for your employee (e.g., eye
contact, put away distractions, non-verbal
cues that indicate you are with them).
2 | Be Caring.
Endorse strengths, listening carefully and
empathizing with their question or issue.

BY THE YEAR 2020,
TWO OUT OF EVERY
THREE MILLENNIALS IN
THE WORKPLACE HOPE
TO BE AT ANOTHER
ORGANIZATION THAN
THE ONE THEY'RE
CURRENTLY IN, OR
SEEK AN ENTIRELY
DIFFERENT CAREER PATH
ALTOGETHER. IT'S VERY
COMMON TO HEAR IN
AN EXIT INTERVIEW
THAT THEY "JUST
NEEDED A CHANGE."
THE DELOITTE
MILLENNIAL SURVEY 2016

endorsement stands alone at least half
the time, and not as a way to grease the
wheels of criticism. Be specific. "Great
job" is OK, but if you tell a direct report,
"The data you presented in that report
was well-organized and shows that you
are thinking about the big picture," not
only will they continue to leverage those
skills, but they will be more open to critical
feedback later.

» MILLENNIAL
Hey! For the record, I earned every one of
those trophies! But yes, the more specific
you are, the more it helps me focus in on my
work. And being involuntarily labeled as the
ADD generation, that's something I really
appreciate - along with shiny objects!

» MANAGER
And I'll take it a step further - I've got a
four-step model of behaviors that I follow
when I'm providing feedback face-to-face or
Skype-to-Skype with a member of my team:

| 22

3 | Be Inspiring.
Tell stories of your successes and challenges,
model an authentic connection to what we
are trying to do as an organization.
4 | Be Rigorous.
Ask questions. Give specific, actionable
feedback to help people get better, and
keep them accountable for their work. But
don't just be rigorous, be present, caring
and inspiring, too.

» MILLENNIAL
And I totally agree with your approach. So
much, in fact, that I'd like to take it a step
further for those times when you have to
provide weightier, more serious feedback,
like when there's an ongoing issue. Here's
a four-step process of how to deliver kind,
yet firm feedback:
1 | Enter with Generosity
When kicking off the conversation, keep
an open mind and assume positive
intent from the get go. Try to clear your
expectations of how the feedback will
land. Be curious, look them in the eye and
allow your direct report to feel welcome
in the space. Be aware of your posture
and facial expressions, because your
expression is a powerful tool for setting
the tone for a meeting.
2 | Expressing Truth with Empathy
While you may be the one delivering the
message, start off by checking in with
your direct report; ask, "How do you feel
the meeting with our client went?" and
allow them to share their experience. This
will help you connect with where they're
coming from first, rather than ripping off the
feedback band-aid. You may discover they
were fully aware of the struggle as well.
Use "I" language instead of "you" and
check in to see if your message is

understood. Make sure the impact of your
communication matches your intention.
Do you want your millennial to take this
feedback and put it into action? Think
about how you want them to feel when
they leave the room and use your words,
face, voice, body and tone to focus those
words into action.
3 | Envision a Win-Win
You both want this conversation to be a
success, so how can you both exit feeling
empowered? Maintain a positive attitude
and be explicit about your intent. Perhaps
brainstorm and collaborate on ideas to use
in the future, or come up with common
goals. Chart or write them down so your
millennial knows that you value their
action steps.
4 | Exit Aligned
Create accountability by assigning next
steps, as well as owners and deadlines
(yourself included). Restate what you
both set to do, and make sure you're both
agreed. Debrief the conversation with
them, asking how they felt it went. This
provides opportunity for clarity as you exit
the conversation.

» MANAGER
Great thoughts. So with some empathy
and understanding on both sides, and by
taking a closer look at legacy policies like
annual reviews, you can avoid or eliminate
many of the issues between managers
and millennials.

» MILLENNIAL
Works for me. That was very inspiring.

» MANAGER
Works for me, too. I do believe we just
exited aligned.
Kate Nugent is the director of product and
training at The Ariel Group. She is a trained
actor and comedian, and an expert in
leadership presence. Drew Jacobs is a training
manager at The Ariel Group, a trained actor, a
lifelong learner, and a millennial managed by
Kate. Email Kate and Drew.

http://www2.deloitte.com/global/en/pages/about-deloitte/articles/gx-millennials-one-foot-out-the-door.html#report http://www2.deloitte.com/global/en/pages/about-deloitte/articles/gx-millennials-one-foot-out-the-door.html#report https://www.uschamberfoundation.org/reports/millennial-generation-research-review http://info.arielgroup.com/blog/author/kate-nugent http://info.arielgroup.com/blog/author/drew-jacobs

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of Training Industry Magazine - November/December 2016