CAREGIVER'S CORNER Have You Adopted the " Me First " Mentality? You've probably heard the following advice at some point: " put on your own oxygen mask first. " Outside of airplanes, it's meant to remind you to practice self-care and tend to your own physical, mental and spiritual needs so you can show up as the parent you want to be. Let's take it a step further: putting on your oxygen mask first also means listening carefully to yourself and looking inward to watch the thoughts and feelings that drive your interactions with your children. Take some time to reflect on your parenting. After a few deep breaths, consider the following: - What did you learn about parenting from your childhood? - How do you react internally to your child's feelings and behaviors? - Who do you want to be as a parent? Answering these questions honestly might give you a clearer perspective on how you interact with your children-some of your behaviors might be very intentional. Some may be less so. It's possible your own need for survival as a child left you with some beliefs that no longer benefit you. For example: if your feelings were invalidated as a child, you may feel uncomfortable when children share their feelings, and you might accidentally invalidate their emotions with a cold response. Looking inward can give you the power to override any " unloving " behaviors. Then you can show up with compassion and validate your children's feelings. This is key to clearing the path toward deeper connection, understanding and cooperation with your children. When chaos strikes (as it so often does), take a pause. Ask yourself what you feel and need, then tune in to what your child wants and needs. Now you can respond in your most thoughtful manner and with everyone's best interests at heart.