NEPA Vital Signs - Summer Fall 2019 - 27

SUMMER/FALL 2019

Feature

Balancing the Scales
(Quantity Versus Quality)

A

s a resident physician, I do not have
a magical formula on how to balance
work and personal life. I do have a
system that works for me and perhaps after
reading further, you may implement it in
your life. Getting into a residency program
was a dream I have always had. It was a goal
I pursued wholeheartedly and a challenge
I anticipated. My first reaction when I
matched into the Family Medicine Residency
Program in Wilkes-Barre, was to pump my
fist into the air. The ridiculous grin on my
face melted to a smile of love and happiness
as I gazed upon my husband, Gurminder,
cuddling with our beautiful four-monthold daughter, Simran. As I was watching
my family, apprehension crept through my
mind. The uncertainty raised a question that
faces many working parents: Will I be able
to balance work and personal life? Which
of course spiraled into more questions.
How will I balance it? What sacrifices will
I have to make? Can I give enough of my
time, enough of me to my family or will I
be sucked into a tornado, like Dorothy in
The Wizard of Oz?
Uprooting my family from Southern
California to Northeast Pennsylvania was
a formidable decision. Gurminder would
hit pause on his job, Simran would be
wrenched from her grandparents, and we
would be far far away from our extensive
& solid support system.
Gurminder chose to view this as an
adventure of a lifetime and organized a
trip to drive across the United States. We
cruised along the scenic Colorado river,
enjoyed breathtaking canyons, sped across
the rugged plains, and dined on local cuisine.
Those five days and four nights were the
most memorable and adventurous moments
of our lives. Continually obsessing over the
unknown did not change reality. Instead I
learned it is important to be flexible and
adapt your schedule accordingly. You never
know, maybe you might decide to drive
across the United States.

administrative work. In addition, I have
time to eat a hearty breakfast and drink
a cup of coffee to keep me moving during
the day. In between all of this, I can work
out to keep myself healthy. Those two and
half hours in the morning before I drive
to work allows me to indulge in playing
building blocks with Simran or watch the
new Avengers movie with my husband
in the afternoon.

Residency started with a whirlwind
affair of guidelines, requirements,
rules, regulations, and paperwork. It is
easy to lose yourself in work and forget
yourself, your family, your hobbies,
your pleasures, and not realize what you
are missing. After a long day at work, I
would come home to learn Simran took
her first step or Gurminder prepared a
new recipe for dinner. It is so easy for
me to let work surround me day and
night, but it also brought the realization
that I am missing out on Gurminder and
Simran's adventures. The next thought
was I need a game plan because my family
makes me a better physician. I needed to
figure out how being a physician would
make me a better spouse and parent.
Having a supportive husband made all
of the difference in the world in curtailing the anxiety.
Other things that helped me strike a
balance were organization and the commitment to adhere to a schedule. It made
the difference between floundering in two
worlds to succeeding in both. My husband
wakes me up at 5 AM every morning so I
can do any number of tasks from studying,
reading an AAFP article, to completing
N E PA

27

VITAL SIGNS

Sometimes it is necessary to define
boundaries both mentally and geographically. When I cross the bridge from
Kingston to Wilkes-Barre, I say to myself
that after giving a 100 percent of myself
at work, my family deserves a 100 percent
of me when I am at home. Putting work
in the recesses of my mind, I make those
three to four hours memorable. That
time is reserved for enjoying dinner with
loved ones, playing peek a boo with my
daughter, and planning to get away on
weekend trips with my family.
My system is the best for me. It is not
a perfect balance timewise, but I have
more quality family time. Now I can be
available to my family and still rock at
work. The key is to have dedicated time,
clear boundaries, and stick to the plan.
Work and life will throw curveballs. It
is not necessary to have one consume
the other unless you let it. If balanced
appropriately, the two worlds complement each other. Being a better wife
and mother lets me be a better physician which in turn makes me a better
wife and mother.

MANDEEP SINGH, MD, is a current
second-year resident leader and elected
chief resident of Luzerne Family Medicine
Residency Program at The Wright Center
for Graduate Medical Education. She is
currently on the Board of Directors of
Luzerne County Medical Society.
NEPA Vital Signs - Summer Fall 2019

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