GRAND Magazine - January/February 2011 - (Page 42)

* grandparent rights Reinventing the holidays A grieving grandmother finds her own way to survive the holidays BY SUSAN HOFFMAN Dear Susan, Susan Hoffman is director of Advocates for Grandparent Grandchild Connection. 42 GRAND There are no signs of a holiday season at my house. There are no decorations, no lights strung outside or in, no wreath, no tree, no music, no holiday parties and no Christmas spirit. I agree that I may fit the “bah-humbug” profile, except for one thing: I do remember my loved ones with gifts. The joy of Christmas ended for me about five years ago as I anxiously awaited the arrival of my 3-year-old grandson to come and spend our first-ever Christmas Day together. I had invited my parents and siblings to share in the celebration of this very special holiday, where we would all be able to finally watch him open his gifts. Our merriment soon turned to sorrow when my son walked through the door without little Alex. He had accepted the mom’s excuse that Alex had suddenly come down with the flu and chalked it up to yet another thwarted visit. Things never got better. Alex never came back. His dad’s frustration grew to the point that he simply gave up and stopped trying, eventually fading out of the picture entirely, but I kept fighting until I came across an unyielding judge who blocked my access as a result of a long and drawn-out court battle. For me the traditions that go along with the Xmas holidays died that day. I have chosen to reinvent the holidays by eliminating traditions; I can only do what I am comfortable with, and one of those things is to make a charitable contribution to another child in my grandson’s name, and this is how I survive an otherwise stressful time. —Grandma Scrooge JAN FEB 2011 Share this article with your friends.

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - January/February 2011

Grand - Jan/Feb 2011
Grand Treasure Hunt
Table of Contents
Grand View
Grand Central
Fabulous After 50
A Midlife Faith
Grand Products
Cover Story
Grands With a Mission
Your Grandkids' Health
Dr. Marion
Health on Hold
Boomers and Boomerang Kids
Grandparent Rights
Kinship Care
Grand Families
Talking Can Save Your Life
Grand Finale

GRAND Magazine - January/February 2011