GRAND Magazine - July/August 2011 - (Page 24)

Bite your tongue? A How to stay connected with your grown children BY RITA BRHEL uthor Ruth Nemzoff is a grandmother who believes that parenting doesn’t end just because your child turns 21, gets married or gives birth to her own children. In fall 2010 I talked with Ruth about her book Don’t Bite Your Tongue: How to Foster Rewarding Relationships with Your Adult Children. Here are some of her views on Attachment Parenting when the kids leave home: v When my first child got married, everyone said to keep my mouth shut and my pocketbook open. I thought that was terrible advice. I didn’t want my relationships with my children to be about giving them money. That’s what first got me thinking about relationships with adult children being a mix of obligation and choice. 24 GRAND JULY AUG 2011 “No parent is the perfect parent. We all make mistakes.” v The three-generation relationship “grandparent-parent-child” is incredibly important, because it can either facilitate parenting or debilitate parenting. For example, when a new baby comes, it’s very important to clarify roles ahead of time. The grandparent may come in and expect to care for the newborn, but the mother wants them to be the cook and dish washer. Or, the mother may say she wants to spend all of her time

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - July/August 2011

GRAND - July/Aug 2011
Grand Treasure Hunt
Table of Contents
Grand View
Grand Central
American Pride (and Peace of Mind)
The Golden Now
Cover Story: The Baby Boomers’ Guide to Grandparenting
2011 Awards for Best Grandparenting Books
Bite Your Tongue?
Grand Products
Extraordinary Grands: Claudia Timbo
Grand Families: Going Through the Fire
Birds Do It
Grandparent Rights: Brainwashing Hannah
Teaching Kindness by Example
Getting Creative with Childhood Obesity
Toys ’n Tech
“Whadya Say??”
Grand Finale
The Big Reveal
Op Ed: Same-Sex Marriage, Pro or No?
Kinship Care Resources
Find Fun Things to Do

GRAND Magazine - July/August 2011