GRAND Magazine - September/October 2019 - 37

legacy
and a helper. Think of examples you
want to use to broach the subject.
Consider examples that might be
parallel to something a grandchild
might experience.
Let your grandchildren know
that suffering can be big things like
natural disasters or loss of a job. But
there are also day-to-day things that
bring people down: someone does
poorly on a test, or kids gang up on
another student.

" "
Some studies show that
compassion is actually
good for survival.

Another way is to ask your grandchild to share a
story about a time that someone showed compassion to them. Compassion might be too abstract of a
concept for young grandchildren. But they will likely
be able to think of times they felt sad or someone was
mean to them. Ask them who was nice to them and
tried to make them feel better. That is compassion.
You may also connect compassion to things they
see in the news. Years ago, a friend's office was collecting money to send to the Red Cross for relief after
Hurricane Katrina. His granddaughter, then five, contributed two quarters to add to the till. Grandpa wrote
the check for $50.50, just so his granddaughter could
see her contribution being counted.
As grandparents with full lives, you've probably
experienced compassion on both ends: as a victim
37 GRAND

SEPT-OCT 2019

Whether it's in person or online,
let your grandchild know they can be the one to say
something. They have the power to stand up for and
be a friend to the person who has
been hurt.

Research says: Compassion
is good for you.
Ask your grandchild to share a
time that they showed compassion to someone else. Chances are
their eyes will light up; their pupils
will dilate. They will feel good. And
research supports that response.
There has been extensive

research into compassion. Some studies show that
compassion is actually good for survival. Even babies
and rats (yes, rats!) show compassion. (Read more on
compassion research here and here.)
Studies also show that mindfulness and self-awareness can help compassion grow. Talk to your grandchild about situations they see in school and life. Role
play and imagine how they can respond with compassion, so they are ready to act when a situation arises.
Let your grandchildren know that it's okay to talk
to you. Talk about signs that it's time to talk to an
adult whether it's you, a parent or a school official.
Particularly with cyber-bullying, the consequences
can be deadly. It's never okay for kids to urge another
child to hurt themselves or to commit suicide. And
while that is taking it to the extreme-one child could
be the one to say. "Stop! This isn't right."

Click here for The Amazing
Power of Kids and Compassion and
to tell us a special story of compassion

Jerry Witkovsky, Author of The
Grandest Love and a long-time social
work professional, grandparenting
activist, and passionate grandpa,
author Jerry Witkovsky offers fresh
approaches to help grandparents
enter their grandchild's world, to leave
values, not just valuables and create a living legacy. Jerry
shares more about the Grandparent-Grandchild Connection
School Program and encourages grandparents to unleash
their creativity and unique gifts to transform their family
at www.grandparentsunleashed.com.

https://www.facebook.com/GRANDmagazine/ https://www.twitter.com/grandMmagazine https://www.sciencemag.org/news/2015/05/rats-forsake-chocolate-save-drowning-companion https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/three_insights_from_the_cutting_edge_of_compassion_research https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/feeling-it/201306/compassion-our-first-instinct https://www.grandmagazine.com/2019/08/amazing-power-of-kids/ https://www.grandmagazine.com/2019/08/amazing-power-of-kids/ https://www.grandmagazine.com/2019/08/amazing-power-of-kids/ https://www.amazon.com/dp/B079K2XSFX/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1 https://www.amazon.com/GRANDEST-LOVE-Inspiring-Grandparent-Grandchild-Connection-ebook/dp/B00GXAYNCM?ie=UTF8&btkr=1&ref_=dp-kindle-redirect https://www.amazon.com/GRANDEST-LOVE-Inspiring-Grandparent-Grandchild-Connection-ebook/dp/B00GXAYNCM?ie=UTF8&btkr=1&ref_=dp-kindle-redirect https://www.amazon.com/dp/B079K2XSFX/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1 https://www.grandparentsunleashed.com/ http://www.grandparentsunleashed.com

GRAND Magazine - September/October 2019

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