GRAND Magazine - Spring 2020 - 29

invisible grands

Birthdays aren't always happy
Grandparents who are alienated or estranged from their
adult children... need to find ways to alleviate their own
sadness on days that are supposed to be happy.
Ways to turn sadness into joy

* On days when painful memories haunt you
consider giving yourself the gift of "constructive wallowing." Tina Gilbertson writes: accept and feel your
feelings with self-compassion, it will allow you greater
emotional health and wellbeing.
* Adopt a great, great grandperson. Visit an elder
in a nursing home or rehab facility regularly. Ask for
and listen to their tales of memorable birthdays.

* Remember to grandmother yourself. Virtually
gift yourself. Find something you love to do and do it!
Make or buy yourself the gift you would like to have
received.

emember the scene from Disney's Alice in
Wonderland where the Mad Hatter has a
tea party for everyone and sings "A very
merry UNbirthday to you, to you."? Many grand* Create your own birthday, go out for your own
parents who are alienated or estranged from
favorite foods, topped off with the sweet treat you
their adult children have no way to participate
love.
in annual birthday parties for their grandkids or
have their grandchildren participate in their own.
* Turn off the TV, hide your cell phone, take a walk
They really need to find ways to alleviate their
in nature. Give yourself the gift of stillness.
own sadness on days that are supposed to be
* Help someone else's grandkid. Give the gift of
happy.
29 GRAND

SPRING 2020

reading, writing and arithmetic to a young person.
Become a foster grandparent. Opportunities for
tutoring and mentoring would be of great service
to our future generations. Check out the Foster
Grandparents program here.
* Pray to a higher power, God, Jesus, Gaia or whatever you may believe in.
My minister says, "pain pushes but vision pulls."
Finally, by all means never give up hope (Holding
Only Positive Expectations). Imagine reconciliation.
Visualizing does work to make things happen, not
necessarily in your own, but divine right timing.
Have a happy unbirthday every day!
Dr. Pat Hanson is a seasoned health educator,
public speaker. workshop facilitator and novice
comedienne. She is the author of Invisible
Grandparenting: Leave a Legacy of Love
whether You Can be There or Not and In Search
of Stillness: My Final Frontier.
www.invisiblegrandparent.com
Facebook.com/Patricia Hanson
Facebook.com/Stillness: My Final Frontier
Facebook.com/Invisible Grandparent

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0994809700/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=grandmagazi0d-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=0994809700&linkId=c0cf2342749a51234e00421ef2df453e https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003B6QYSW/ref=as_li_qf_sp_asin_il_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=grandmagazi0d-20&camp=1789&creative=9325&linkCode=as2&creativeASIN=B003B6QYSW&linkId=74a78ba0a510c9871c2e38f745d59213 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdsZT7WKjW8 https://www.nationalservice.gov/programs/senior-corps/senior-corps-programs/fostergrandparents https://www.tinagilbertson.com https://www.nationalservice.gov/programs/senior-corps/senior-corps-programs/fostergrandparents http://www.invisiblegrandparent.com http://www.invisiblegrandparent.com http://www.Facebook.com/Patricia http://www.Facebook.com/Stillness http://www.Facebook.com/Invisible

GRAND Magazine - Spring 2020

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - Spring 2020