GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023 - 14
ask dr. gramma karen
How to be
a lifeline for
an unfavored
grandchild
BY KAREN L. RANCOURT
distraught grandmother
sought my advice concerning
her granddaughter:
My son-in-law bullies my
6-year-old granddaughter Katy,
while showering affection on her
3-year-old twin siblings - hugging
and kissing them and telling them
he loves them over and over.
14 GRAND Winter/Spring 2023
A
The day after Thanksgiving, Katy woke up and made a poster
for every member of the family, saying she loved them. Then, we
went for her a walk. Her father had been sleeping in, and when
we got back from our walk, he didn't say good morning to her or
ask her how the walk was. He began dressing her down in front
of us. He looked at the posters but didn't say anything.
It's as though she cannot do anything right. Furthermore, he
tries to draw my daughter to his side against Katy. She vacillates
between them, sometimes sticking up for Katy, but also favoring
the twins.
I spoke individually to him once about his criticism of
Katy. He acknowledged that he didn't get along with Katy
all that well. For a while, he made a show for me of being
nice to her, which I didn't believe. He is back to over
disciplining her. She blurted out to me yesterday that
her father loved her siblings more than he loved
her and that he wasn't fair to her.
I feel very uncomfortable with the whole situation,
and I feel his verbal abuse will have
damaging consequences. What can I do?
My response
Your concern for Katy's emotional
and psychological well-being sounds
warranted. From what you describe,
she is, as author Grace Marguerite
Williams explains, an " unfavored
child. "
Continued on next page
https://www.facebook.com/GRANDmagazine
https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/The-Unfavored-Child-In-The-Family
https://owlcation.com/social-sciences/The-Unfavored-Child-In-The-Family
GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023
Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023
Contents
GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023 - Cover1
GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023 - 2
GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023 - 3
GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023 - Contents
GRAND Magazine - Winter 2023 - 5
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