Theatre Design & Technology - Fall 2021 - 22

As a result of the three As, we sometimes
attempt to help by saying yes, but
this false sense of altruism can cause
more harm than good. " When you feel
guilty about taking care of your selfinterests,
you
wrongly assume that
someone else's situation will somehow
improve by your deprivation " (Golden
2011). We wrongly believe that protecting
our self-interests makes us selfish,
and that being selfish is bad.
Sometimes young managers feel like
they cannot say " no, " regardless of the
strength of their data. Declaring, " I have
determined " or " My numbers indicate "
leaves them feeling guilty, self-centered,
or downright selfish, feeling trapped
between a rock and a hard place, leading
to a " yes " when a " no " is more appropriate.
But perhaps the trap is one of
language and our relationship with the
word selfish.
OK to be Self...Ish
Merriam-Webster's 2021 Online Dictionary
defines " selfish " as follows:
1. Devoted to or caring for oneself; concerned
with one's own self-interest,
benefits, welfare, etc. ... regardless of
others.
2. characterized by or manifesting concern
or care only for oneself.
Even the more benign term, " self-interest "
does not fare much better:
1. Regard for one's own interest or
advantage, esp. with disregard for
others.
2. personal interest or advantage "
This is strident language. If we take
these explanations at face value, is it
any surprise we relegate ourselves to
believing that the false altruism of putting
others' needs before our own (or
our crews) is our only real option? If we
do not speak up for ourselves or those
in our charge, then who will? Can we afford
to abdicate this vital responsibility?
Does it help anyone to say stay silent in
the face of bad news? If we hope to create
healthier workplaces, we must stop
using language that limits our ability to
draw realistic boundaries.
In " Self-interest vs. selfish: What's
the Really BIG Difference? Is there anything
wrong with being the center of
your universe? " Dr. Leon Seltzer asks
" What happens if you hyphenate the
word selfish?
" Among the meanings of '-ish' are:
22 | THEATRE DESIGN & TECHNOLOGY | FALL 2021
WHEN A SHOP
MANAGER SAYS
" NO, " IT IS NOT
A NO TO WORK
OR TO THE
SHOW OR TO
PERFORMING
THEIR DUTIES AS
STIPULATED BY
THE CONTRACT.
IT IS A " NO " TO
THE PROJECT
AS CURRENTLY
ENVISIONED.
'having the characteristics of, belonging
to,' or 'concerned with.' " Hyphenating
the word selfish, making it 'self-ish'
changes the entire connotation into
something positive.'I am not an egomaniac;
I am simply someone concerned
with my 'self' " (Seltzer 2011).
This description suggests a selfprotecting
quality to both the word and
the idea of selfishness. There should be
nothing wrong with placing my needs
as my primary concern, so long as I do
not become so self-absorbed that I lose
sight of the people with whom I interact.
Seltzer also says, " What makes an
act selfish (rather than self-ish) is being
disregardful, or at the expense of
others' welfare. It involves a 'concern
for' self that is excessive or exclusive "
(Seltzer 2011).
In Everything is Workable: a Zen
Approach to Conflict Resolution, Diane
Musho Hamilton uses the phrase " small
I " to define our wants, needs, and preferences.
In her work as a facilitator and
mediator, she advocates for recognizing
the legitimacy of our needs and blending
them with a realistic sense of self
to produce what she calls the " healthy
ego. " Adopting this mentality when engaging
in problem-solving allows us to
protect our interests while still validating
other perspectives (Hamilton 2013,
77).
Adopting either Seltzer's reconsideration
of the word selfish or Hamilton's
call to embrace our healthy ego when
teaching students how to navigate these
difficult conversations might make it
easier for them to find their voices and
strengthen their resolve to soften our
edges as we discuss what can be realistically
achieved within the project scope
as defined by the organization.
We can achieve great things as long
as we acknowledge and effectively address
the accompanying risks. Saying
" no " is a responsibility when the assessment
process determines that the
scope exceeds the available resources.
However, it is incumbent upon us to express
our pragmatism in a way the other
stakeholders hear as a positive step
towards achieving the artistic goal and
not a negative statement that makes us
seem like an obstructionist. We cannot
control how others hear what we say,
but we can control how we express the
message.
The required " no, " comes from the
right place, with positive energy focused
on common goals that move the
process forward. This means utilizing
a process that gives us enough information
to accurately see and articulate the
pitfalls of the project under consideration.
Paperwork, therefore, is the key
to success. At the beginning of my professional
career, I looked at the budget
and the calendar as adversaries I needed
to wrestle into submission. Now I
see them as allies. They set the context
within which I am working. If the show's
scope exceeds the boundaries defined
by the organization, it's an opportunity
to open the conversation to look for solutions.
" No, " is part of the creative tension
created by the budget constraints
and schedule that forces us all to dig
deeper and find other possibilities.
We must be careful about convincing
ourselves to move forward in the face of
data showing us the project is beyond
the stated project scope. Shop managers
are " fixers " ; who thrive on being the
people who can " get it done " when others
walk away. But there is a time and a
place for this energy.
In the initial stages of the project,
the get-it-done attitude is ill-placed and
Theatre Design & Technology - Fall 2021

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of Theatre Design & Technology - Fall 2021
