Elephants and Tea - September 2019 - 27

surgeries resulting in the complete fusion of my entire back,
except for my neck.
It is a bit difficult for me to talk about all of my late effects
because I like to try to hide them so that people see ME, as
opposed to a bunch of medical conditions. I also strive to
maintain a positive, happy perspective, and I do not want to
be seen as complaining. However, I do not want you to think
that I am always a positive, happy, bubbly person because
I can have difficult days with depression and anxiety, and
feelings of worthlessness and despair! Yet, it is more difficult
to conquer these feelings the longer that I have them, so I try
to learn what I can and fight to move on as soon as I am able.
I believe that difficult experiences and hardships in life
can lead to incredible wisdom and teach us valuable lessons,
and this belief has really enriched my life and propelled me
through difficult situations. Many of us experience pain and
difficulties in life, but it is how we respond that is important.
You can choose to let it get you down and let it define your
life in a negative way, or you could use it to learn valuable
lessons and focus on what you do have in life and what you
can do to help others! A key lesson that I have learned is to
focus on hope, optimism and positivity. Having a young child
dealing with cancer and survivorship, my parents liked to
extol the virtue of Norman Vincent Peale's book and belief
in, "The Power of Positive Thinking." Peale, an American
minister and author, believed that anyone could prevail over
difficulties in life with positivity, optimism and hope. Although you cannot change the fact that
cancer is or has been in your life, you can strive to change how you think, respond and deal with
it. Even on the most difficult days, amidst anger and depression, there is something positive to be
found, and changing your perspective can be incredibly powerful. Personally, I try to challenge
myself to find that "silver lining" in any situation, whether it is during or after a particularly
difficult time. It can be something as simple as a kind word or a smile, or learning how much
your family and friends love and support you. In addition, injecting a little humor into life has
multiple benefits, but it also simply feels good to laugh! Laughter and humor can bring about
joy and happiness, which can make it a little easier to achieve positivity, optimism and hope.
Another important lesson that I have learned is that I need God and my faith to help me
through the difficult moments in my life, especially on the days where it feels next to impossible
to be strong. My faith has also helped me maintain a positive, optimistic, hopeful mentality and
perspective on life. Believing and praying to a higher power provides my anxious, worrying
mind with a sense of peace, and it is very comforting to know that I am never alone and there is
someone guiding me through the twists and turns of life.
The love, help, support and comfort of my "inner circle," which consists of my husband, my
parents, my best friend and my two therapy cats, is another key component in my life. These
people (and animals!) know absolutely everything about me, love me unconditionally, and I am
able to talk to them about anything. It is so important to have at least one person that you can talk
to and truly be yourself, whether that person offer advice, or they simply listen and silently offer
comfort and support. Talking to someone can help put issues into perspective, but more importantly, it allows you to take care of yourself by getting your thoughts out and feeling less alone.
I am very blessed to have a Bachelor's Degree in Political Science and a Master's Degree in
Business Administration. However, my medical issues and pain have compounded and worsened significantly since college so I do need to rest often. This does not allow me to work a "conventional" job, yet I still strive to be productive so I work from my couch on my laptop, with
my two cats lying next to me! I am writing a book about my cancer experiences, my late effects
and other medical issues, my philosophies on life and positivity as well as how I am making it
through this long, difficult ordeal. I also play the oboe professionally in a variety of ensembles
in my community.

Although you
cannot change
the fact that
cancer is or has
been in your life,
you can strive to
change how you
think, respond,
and deal with it.

One of my desires in life has been to fight
childhood cancer and to help patients, survivors, families and caregivers. Practicing
gratitude and helping others is so important,
and I try to accomplish this through my work
with nine different cancer-related nonprofits.
I have had some amazing experiences doing
this work, but more importantly, I finally
feel like I am doing what I am supposed to
be doing with my life! Through my work,
I communicate with families and patients
going through childhood cancer, as well as
survivors, and I also do research, write, speak
at events, raise funds, advocate and spread
awareness about childhood cancer for various
organizations. I lead the survivorship interest
group for the Coalition Against Childhood
Cancer (CAC2), and I am on the Board of
Directors for that organization, as well as for
the Neuroblastoma Children's Cancer Society.
Additionally, I am on the State Leadership
Board for the American Cancer Society, and
I have had some amazing opportunities as an
ambassador for the American Cancer Society
Cancer Action Network (ACS CAN), lobbying for both state and federal cancer-related
legislation. This year, I was sent to Washington, D.C. for multiple lobby days, I spoke at a
congressional briefing, and I made a television
commercial for an ACS CAN initiative. My
ultimate goal in life has always been to help
people, and I truly hope that this what I am
doing with my nonprofit work.
When life is not going quite right, and I am
experiencing incredible amounts of pain or
my medical conditions are exacerbated, I try
to remind myself that I survived childhood
cancer at a time when many others did not. It
will be 40 years from my cancer diagnosis in
June, and I have fought to not only be a survivor, but also a "thriver", despite my many
medical conditions and chronic pain. All of
these experiences have taught me incredible
lessons about life, including hope, optimism,
positivity, humor, faith, having an "inner circle," gratitude, and the importance of doing
meaningful work. Furthermore, I learned
that hope, optimism and positivity can exist
in difficult situations and moments of despair.
It is my wish that you, too, can incorporate
some of these lessons learned from a childhood cancer survivor into your own lives.
➥ BY M A R I A H FOR S T E R
OL S ON, C H I L DHO OD C A NC E R
SU RV I VOR

ELEPHANTSANDTEA.COM
SEPTEMBER 2019

http://www.elephantsandtea.com

Elephants and Tea - September 2019

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