Elephants and Tea - September 2022 - 14

Sexuality INTIMATE ISSUES WITH MARLOE
you see in them, and the qualities you most admire about
them. Encourage them to share the same.
9. Extend a helping hand. Whether it's raising funds or collecting
donations for an organization you both believe in, or volunteering
your shared time or skills, finding ways to support a
common cause together can build comradery and a shared
sense of empowerment.
10. Examine your growth and triumphs as a couple. Why did you
choose each other? How has your relationship changed and
strengthened since you have been together? What makes you
a dynamite pair?
11.
Embark on an awe-inspiring adventure together. You don't have
to go far, and it doesn't have to take long or cost a bundle. If
you're up for some physical activity, get out for a short hike
in an area you haven't yet explored (urban or wilderness). If
you need to take it easy, find a spot to watch the sunrise or
sunset. Seek out a dark sky and stargaze. Visit an art gallery
or a museum. Explore and create memories that tie your relationship
together.
12. Express your appreciation for your partner's support. Illustrate
your point with concrete examples of ways and reasons
your life is better for having them in it.
13. Expand your horizons by trying something new together. Maybe
a cooking class, or a Paint Nite, or tennis lessons. Whatever
it is, the common experience of uncertainty and learning will
provide ample opportunity for mutual encouragement and
fun. Maybe you will uncover a hidden talent! At the very
least, novel activities that help you learn from one another
and about each other can keep intimate connections alive.
14. Establish a common goal or task, and then use your complementary
skills to work together to achieve it. Maybe it's
tackling that house project you have been putting off, building
a garden in the backyard with the goal of harvesting your
favorite veggies, or organizing all the mystery boxes in the
basement. Collaborating to accomplish something is a great
reason to celebrate!
15. Elicit laughter. Cancer can seriously suck the fun out of life,
but if you look for it, there's nearly always something you
can find humor in. Seek out things that make you both smile,
whether it's sharing giggles while watching a classic comedy,
hitting up the local comedy club, or playing a rousing game
of " Would you rather....? " (Likely to instigate both laughter
and provide you with new insight about how your partner's
mind works!) Bonus points for finding ways to poke fun at
yourselves.
16. Exchange fun and fond memories as a couple. Reminiscing
about the ventures you have had together is a great reminder
of the joy that you bring one another. Begin with " Remember
that time we . . . ? "
17. Enlist the help and support of a professional. Mental health
professionals, such as counselors and therapists, are excellent
impartial parties that are skilled at helping couples help themselves.
For example, professionals can offer a fresh perspective,
provide ideas for developing intimacy and finding new ways to
connect, bolster effective communication strategies, and help
you learn how to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. Check out
your cancer center's support services or find a sexual health
expert in your area at www.aasect.org.
18. Embrace each other-literally! When sexual routines change
or are put on hold, sometimes affectionate touch between couples
slows down, too. Your partner might avoid touching you
because they don't want you to feel pressured or guilty about
not participating in sexual activity. You may avoid touching
your partner out of worry that you will give them the " wrong
idea. " But sexual activity aside, affectionate touch is still a very
important need for most people. Loving touch promotes feelings
of relaxation, connection, and comfort. Holding hands,
back rubs, snuggles on the couch or in bed, hugs, kisses, and
caresses are all ways to use physical touch as a catalyst for
emotional intimacy with your partner.
So don't be afraid to reach out, or to lean in! l
Loving touch promotes feelings of
relaxation, connection, and comfort.
Holding hands, back rubs, snuggles on
the couch or in bed, hugs, kisses, and
caresses are all ways to use physical
touch as a catalyst for emotional
intimacy with your partner.
BIBLIOGRAPHY AND RESOURCES:
* " Sexuality and Intimacy, " Cancer Council, 2019. https://www.cancer.org.au/cancer-information/cancer-side-effects/sexuality-and-intimacy. Accessed June 30, 2022.
* " Cancer and Relationships, " Macmillan Cancer Support, 2019. Cancer and relationships. https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/stories-and-media/booklets/cancer-and-relationships. Accessed June 30, 2022.
* Sex and Relationships: Support for Young People Affected by Cancer, Macmillan Cancer Support, 3rd ed, 2019. https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/stories-and-media/booklets/sex-and-relationships-support-for-young-people-affected-by-cancer. Accessed
June 30, 2022.
* " Self-image and Sexuality, " National Cancer Institute, February 12, 2021. https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/coping/self-image. Accessed June 30, 2022.
14
ELEPHANTSANDTEA.COM
SEPTEMBER 2022

http://www.aasect.org https://www.cancer.org.au/cancer-information/cancer-side-effects/sexuality-and-intimacy https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/stories-and-media/booklets/cancer-and-relationships https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/stories-and-media/booklets/sex-and-relationships-support-for-young-people-affected-by-cancer https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/coping/self-image http://www.ELEPHANTSANDTEA.COM

Elephants and Tea - September 2022

Table of Contents for the Digital Edition of Elephants and Tea - September 2022