Elephants and Tea - September 2022 - 24

The Courage of Vulnerability COVER STORY
gym, meeting with friends, etc.
I kept my head, my soul, and my spirit in
check.
I was cynical at times, then I leaned into
the breast cancer online community a little
more and my eyes and heart slowly opened
to the reality of what was happening and
GOING to happen. Yet, it didn't quite sink
in, and I couldn't believe it was happening
to ME.
Still, I pushed on, thankful for the inner grit
and conscious grace that I felt carrying me
through.
But.
THAT DAY?
I broke.
I want to say that I sat on my bed and just
wept silently and had tranquil music on
and wiped away my silent little tears, but I
didn't.
It wasn't pretty.
In fact, it was the ugliest thing I have ever
seen.
It was like an out-of-body experience where
I am screaming at myself to stop, and yet
screaming at myself to get it all out.
My kids weren't home,
and it just took someone's insensitive
remark, and it broke the dam that had been
building for months.
It broke me and I screamed and screamed.
I stood there with unbridled tears streaming
down my face and I SCREAMED some
more until it came out as a whimper.
I threw things and wrecked things.
I dumped over plants and clothes and
anything I could get my hands on.
I wailed and wailed and gasped for air to
scream some more.
When I had cleaned it all up again, I took a
hot shower and found myself crumpled on
the bathtub floor, weeping again.
Mental health and cancer go hand in hand. I
truly think we need to have a mental health
professional standing right next to our
different oncologists at our first appointment.
They are NEEDED and honestly just
as important, in my opinion, to our survival
and ongoing " veteran " status.
Today, the smells, sounds, and scans still
trigger this cancer veteran, and yet I also
have more tools in my arsenal.
We have been through so much and we are
still here-against all odds, and that my
friend is such a gift.
So, place your hand on your heart right now.
That's a living, beating proof of PURPOSE.
Lean in.
There's a safe space here for you.
Love you. Mean it. l
HERE ARE SOME
THINGS THAT
HAVE HELPED ME
THAT MAY ALSO
HELP YOU:
My cancer community.
Lean in. Some of the best
and most incredible people
I have met and have known
have been from this beautiful
community. There are
amazing organizations and
communities that can't wait
to support you and help
you feel seen and known
through your diagnosis.
They are also filled with
many resources to help you
feel less alone.
Mental health and
cancer go hand
in hand. I truly
think we need to
have a mental
health professional
standing right next
to our different
oncologists at our
first appointment.
24
ELEPHANTSANDTEA.COM
SEPTEMBER 2022
An amazing therapist.
Seriously, I truly think this
is a secret weapon that
many of us keep a secret
or don't use as much as
we probably need to. My
therapist, (God bless him!),
has given me so many tools
to help me cope. Things
like mindfulness, cognitive
behavioral therapy, healing
from my post-traumatic
stress disorder (PTSD)-
something many of us have
after our cancer diagnosis-
the importance of
sleep, and even the beauty
of feeling JOY!
Lastly, give yourself grace.
We are typically quick to
tell others to rest or how
incredible or brave they
are but find it harder to
remind ourselves. REMIND
YOURSELF! Give yourself
that same grace you offer
those you love and respect.
Rest when you need to and
speak kindly about and to
yourself.
http://www.ELEPHANTSANDTEA.COM
Elephants and Tea - September 2022

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