SEAHO Report - Winter 2020 - 32

SEAHO Feature Articles
I almost immediately went into a state of submerged numbness through Black Male Bypassing the shocking
pain after I was called with the news that my 27-year-old cousin passed away as I was leaving the UNCG
campus on my way to Virginia to see him. I wanted to Black Male Bypass that moment but the pain was too
piercing.
So yes, I have accumulated quite the experience with Black Male Bypassing moments that did not feel good and
those that I did not want to deal with in the moment. However, the damage was that I never went back to those
feelings. I never freed those feelings but instead I held my hurt hostage. I buried them as hidden living bodies
of ignored energy and existence beneath my subconscious. It is like applying first aid wrapping to a wound,
but never lifting or removing the first aid wrap to check to see if the wound is even healing. It reminded me
of the reflecting on the defining of Black masculinity when I hear music from thought-provoking talents like
North Carolina native artist Jermaine "J Cole" Cole. One of the striking, unfortunately truthful lyrics in his song
Middle Child is, "We coming from a long bloodline of trauma, we raised by our mamas, Lord, we gotta heal...
distorted self-image, we set up to fail..." This Black Man needed healing. In all of these Black Male Bypassing
instances over the years, it developed into a personal and pervasive, second-nature act of avoidance-based
numbness. This is not okay. As Black Men, I believe we need to commit to and be supported in exploring and
redefining our Black masculinity and all the intersectionalities that exist to be healthier, more holistic beings.
For those that do not identify as Black Men, I ask you to reflect on what role self-care plays in helping you
navigate the noes. Additionally, the next time you see a Black Man, before you ask them "how are you doing,"
ask them "what are you carrying?" It may be the reason they may seem down, distant, or distracted. For me,
typically my head is hung low when there is great weight on my shoulders. We are often not only carrying our
identity and the intersectionalities, but we are carrying, combating, and challenging the stereotypical defining of
Black Men and masculinity that may be established by society, media, and other subliminal to overt historical
and current influencers.
Black Masculinity & Black Male Mental Health Matters
My BMB sounds very close to the interesting correlation between the concept of a "broken thermostat,"
environmental stresses, and cortisol levels in African American males that Briana Mezuk, Associate Professor in
the Division of Epidemiology at Virginia Commonwealth University, discusses in Chris Jones' Richmond
Magazine article.2 The problematic root of that BMB process is that everything that is so-called "buried" usually
wakes up, gets up, and grows back with a vengeance, often without notice and of greater complexity. It's no
secret that stress leads to a number of cardiovascular diseases, which many have historically and consistently
ranked in the top ten health risks in Black men. In fact, the American Heart Association shares that one in three
adult men have some form of cardiovascular disease and account for 100,000 more cardiovascular disease
deaths than Caucasian men.3 Researcher Paul Archibald shared, "For Black men, mortality is affected by a wide
range of biopsychosocial risk exposures during critical periods of the life course, one of which is the point when
Black men become involved in the workforce and are exposed to work-related stress."4
Therefore, silencing and dismissing the notion to actually or verbally acknowledge that we are not okay is
incredibly dangerous to the Black male as an individual and collectively to the Black male community. I have
learned in my unlearning self-work process this is quite arguably a form of self-harm. I imagined what my
emotions feel like when I am not okay. Typically, they feel like balls of oxygenated and roaring flames of fire.

SEAHO Report - Winter 2020

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